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<DIV><FONT face=Arial size=2>Thought this might help start off the weekend
right. I have been spending more time working with different Servers and
OSes, and a friend sent this to me.</FONT></DIV>
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<P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt"><B><SPAN
style="FONT-SIZE: 7.5pt; FONT-FAMILY: Verdana">If Operating Systems Ran The
Airlines</SPAN></B><FONT size=3><FONT face=Univers> <?xml:namespace prefix = o
ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office"
/><o:p></o:p></FONT></FONT></P><SPAN
style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; FONT-FAMILY: Verdana; mso-fareast-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-bidi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-fareast-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA">IF
OPERATING SYSTEMS RAN THE AIRLINES<BR><BR>UNIX Airways:<BR><BR>Everyone brings
one piece of the plane along when they come<BR>to the airport. They all go out
on the runway and put the<BR>plane together piece by piece, arguing non-stop
about what<BR>kind of plane they are supposed to be building.<BR><BR>Air
DOS:<BR><BR>Everybody pushes the airplane until it glides, then they jump<BR>on
and let the plane coast until it hits the ground again.<BR>Then they push again,
jump on again, and so on ...<BR><BR>Mac Airlines:<BR><BR>All the stewards,
captains, baggage handlers, and ticket agents<BR>look and act exactly the same.
Every time you ask questions<BR>about details, you are gently but firmly told
that you don't<BR>need to know, don't want to know, and everything will be
done<BR>for you without your ever having to know, so just shut
up.<BR><BR>Windows Air:<BR><BR>The terminal is pretty and colorful, with
friendly stewards,<BR>easy baggage check and boarding, and a smooth take-off.
After<BR>about 10 minutes in the air, the plane explodes with no
warning<BR>whatsoever.<BR><BR>Windows NT Air:<BR><BR>Just like Windows Air, but
costs more, uses much bigger planes,<BR>and takes out all the other aircraft
within a 40-mile radius<BR>when it explodes.<BR><BR>Linux
Air:<BR><BR>Disgruntled employees of all the other OS airlines decide
to<BR>start their own airline. They build the planes, ticket counters,<BR>and
pave the runways themselves. They charge a small fee to<BR>cover the cost of
printing the ticket, but you can also download<BR>and print the ticket yourself.
When you board the plane, you<BR>are given a seat, four bolts, a wrench and a
copy of the<BR>seat-HOWTO.html. Once settled, the fully adjustable seat
is<BR>very comfortable, the plan leaves and arrives on time without<BR>a single
problem, the in-flight meal is wonderful. You try to<BR>tell customers of the
other airlines about the great trip, but<BR>all they can say is, "You had to do
what with the seat?"</SPAN> </DIV>
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